In Remembrance of Kyra Laine Darger

Last Saturday was St. Patrick’s Day; the day my daughter Kyra died eleven years ago. This is a day that I still mourn, but am grateful that we have a purpose to move forward. I struggled whether to put something at all on this blog as it seems like we have been so personal at times, and it is probably most difficult on me.Kyra's Grave

I am grateful that we have taken her death and used that experience to move forward to make the world a better place. She left us better parents. On Saturday the four of us got together and prayed, remembered and shared. I love my husband and sisterwives more than ever. If you have read Love Times Three, you know her story.  Valerie and her five children were new to our family when she died.  Her death bound us together forever. Kyra will always remain with us.  I decided to pull out a poem that Joe wrote right after she died and share it:

A Father’s LamentKyra's Headstone

Today is your death day
The day I should remember best
Is your birthday,
But I don’t, instead
I think of when you left, and why
And mostly what if…
Of how you would grow
Around those brown eyes,
Of hours to rock you asleep
Play peek-a-boo and hide and seek.
Of hearing you say “Daddy”
A girls giggle or to give you a tickle,
And to see you in school
Score a goal and play a concerto.
There’s the pain of life too, to share
The boyfriends lost,
Sibling fights and bumps and
Bruises of the heart.

Today is your death day
I miss the what if…
If you did not have
One, only a birthday;
Because I barely knew,
You were new
Around those brown eyes
A world of potential lost
From my grasp.
Hope surrendered
And I barely knew
The bruises of your heart.

Today is your death day
What if…
Your parents bond
Was broken?
God’s love had
Gone unspoken
Fear became Faith’s
Accepted Token?
Your memory is still there,
And us you bonded,
You barely knew
The bruises of our hearts.


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8 Responses to In Remembrance of Kyra Laine Darger

  1. Marsa McCool-Solis of ourazfamily says:

    The poem Joe wrote is absolutely beautiful! I can’t tell you how much it touched my heart. Thank you for sharing!

    • Alina says:

      You have been a great supporter and early follower, we appreciate your love and support. It is hard to be so personal in such a public way as it does not come natural and there are so many mean spirited people, especially on line that seem to think our feelings don’t matter. But the love that we have received from people like you has honestly made it meaningful. Perhaps some day when we get to Arizona we can meet your wonderful family. God Bless!

  2. Amalia says:

    Thank you for sharing this.

  3. Sarah says:

    So beautiful! Thank you for so generously choosing to share your lives in this way.

  4. Liz M. says:

    It was very courageous of you to share this pain. I hope that a great deal of good comes from sharing it.

  5. John Nomads says:

    Thank for sharing your heartfelt thoughts. It brings back some of the angst, when my little girl left us in the Lord’s care, 26 years ago.

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