Meet the Darger Family!
Joe
He is kept busy being the main support of a large family and maintaining 3 marital relationships not to mention parent/child relationships. He likes to work out. Interests include, mountain biking, parenting, and alone time.
Alina
With her oldest daughter married and youngest child in kindergarten she is thinking about going to school for her design degree, a long time goal. In addition to interior design, she enjoys gardening, reading and a beach vacation. Her responsibilities include grocery shopping for 20 plus people on a weekly basis.
Vicki
She is the main ‘home mom’ right now, saving our family from daycare. Working on re-purposing where ever she can. When she is not managing the family budget, her recreation includes camping, boating and hiking. She is creative and eventually she would like to take guitar lessons and spend more time crafting.
Valerie
She is working at her successful home and office cleaning business. She keeps the rest of her time occupied with her nine children. With five little girls in a row, her hobbies include spending time baking, reading and sewing with them. She keeps the family in homemade bread.
Samuel (21)
Has lived on his own for some time, and keeping busy with work but in another city, we are missing him. His arrival is always a source of excitement for the little ones as he enjoys spoiling them.
Joseph (21)
Just got back from spending the summer back east at a sales job, where he did quite well for his first year and now has his own apartment. He is planning on helping in one of the family businesses and enrolling back into college. He shares his dad’s love for working out.
Caleb (20)
Just started his second year of college, working full time and still having band practice, scheduling shows and tours and writing music for his band, The Mighty Sequoyah. He lives in Provo but makes weekly appearances to connect to the roots of his musical inspiration.
Amanda (19)
Also living on her own. She just started her internship as a dental assistant. Always the active one, she is part of a community softball league, but still misses playing competitive soccer. Her plans include finishing her schooling and recording more of her original songs.
Laura (19)
A newlywed just getting settled into her new home and new chapter in her life in Louisiana where her husband is employed. As an avid reader she hopes to enroll in a community college there to keep her expansive mind occupied.
Jed (18)
Although a dedicated musician, currently an apprentice in sound engineering field. He is also making his own brand of music. He runs one of the family businesses, has a part time job, does band practice, and helps out with whatever we need. He plans on pursuing after his internship a career as a sound engineer and schooling in that field.
Grayson (17)
A junior in high school, he is one of the primary chauffeurs for the family. Always the responsible one, he has had a part time job since he was 15, even though that meant riding his bike to work. He is super athletic but puts those talents into soccer, water skiing and volleyball.
Liesl (16)
She likes to perform her original songs with guitar in talent shows. She is a high school junior and is a great help around the house and works in our family business. Now the oldest girl at home, she likes to remind Dad she is now a woman. When she is not keeping up on her busy social schedule, she is the other family chauffeur.
Shad (15)
A sophomore in high school, he is working on his sketching and art talents. He is tall, sometimes soft spoken, but his witty sense of humor will often surprise you. He aspires to have his license as early as legally possible.
Louis (14)
He can do anything he puts his mind to, right now he is combining a bike with a small motor that he bought online. This is the one most likely to have a million in the bank. He saves, is resourceful and works hard to get what he wants, despite being too young to find a permanent job. Louis has a natural leadership ability that his peers admire.
Logan (14)
He just finished his third year of little league football where he is running back. He is also the upcoming lead in the school musical, “Your A Good Man Charlie Brown”. A talented musician in his own right he is still working on his own guitar and singing and not getting overwhelmed with the female attention.
Ashton (13)
He is in his second year of little league football, is a super excellent baby sitter and almost always has a great big smile on his face. His humor and impressions are always making the parents laugh, and his responsibility as a brother will make a great father some day.
Madison (13)
Now in middle school, and a tween, she is a great singer and enjoys soccer and biking, taking after her older sister. She is a trusted babysitter for friends and neighbors. Her role is invaluable to her mothers as she is a great role model to her nine younger sisters.
Tavish (12)
He is in his second year of little league football, is very athletic and an intense personality but very nurturing to his younger sisters and brother. He also practices the ukulele. As the oldest in elementary he escorts his six little sisters to the school every day.
Kyra (deceased)
She is the inspiration behind all that we do. We dedicate a chapter of the book, ‘Love Times Three’ to her story and why we speak up on her behalf. She would be 11 this year, and she is always near our hearts.
Kyley (10)
Planning to be a teacher when she grows up, she gets plenty of kids to practice on right here at home. She teaches herself songs on the piano and is ALWAYS asking questions, making schedules and keeps us entertained with her “out of the box” thinking.
Sabrina (9)
She loves to sing along with her favorite singer, Taylor Swift. She is sporty and loves the water and horses. She loves school and playing with her sisters.
Kadence (8)
She is quiet and shy, but very creative and prefers to use that outlet to express herself. She recently drew some dress designs, complete with accessories for Laura’s wedding, and has written a few songs. She also likes to dance and play the piano.
Allie (8)
Ever the expressive one with her emotions, she loves to draw pictures of people and writes special notes to them. She just got new eye glasses which have really helped as she loves to read books. She is a future Broadway star with her dramatic abilities.
Vanessa (6)
She is very observant for her age. She loves ballet, and babies! She is always seen playing with them. As a new kindergartner she is relieved to have school to keep her busy mind engaged.
Angelina (5)
Super independent and a little feisty, and very particular about how she does her hair. Also a kindergartner, she loves to practice writing the letters she has been learning.
Boston (4)
One brother surrounded by lots of sisters. He is missing his older sisters, Angelina and Vanessa for playmates now that they are in school. He has a contagious laugh that brings a positive energy to the family.
Krista (2)
She has us all wrapped with her spunky smile, she talks, laughs and thinks she’s a big kid. With all of the older siblings her vocabulary is rapidly expanding. She discovered that she loves boating and is always asking to “go on a boat”.
Victoria (18 months)
Still a crawler, she loves to play with the big kids. She is smart enough to play up on the fact that she is adored by her 22 siblings and gets carried like a princess wherever she likes.
Hunter
Came to us as a stray pup. We sometimes call her Gypsy because she is. At various times she has left us to go on “walk abouts” only to our relief, to return to her true home. We chronicle the latest escapade in one of our blogs. She is of German Shepherd descent, is gentle with all of the kids, tolerates their affection and is our best friend.
I heard your interview this morning with Johnny Dare, 98.9 The Rock, Kansas City. As a Lutheran, my hat is off to you! I admire your courage to come forth with the book, the interviews and your abilities to NOT rely on government assistance. I am a single mother of one, 14 month old girl-Gabbie, and refuse to use state assistance. I eat a lot of Ramen noodles to afford the good things for her! Best of luck with continued success on your book.
Take care !!! Kendra
Hi,
I just finished your book, and wanted to say how much I enjoyed it. My life couldn’t be further from yours (I’m single, no kids, pagan), but we are similar in that we live lives different than the mainstream, and just want to be allowed to live with dignity and respect and freedom. Kudos for being brave enough to come out into the spotlight and stand up for what you believe in!
Best wishes for all of you,
~Lori
Thank you for your support. Our is a great country when we can all live by the principles by which it was created, and live free.
Darger Family,
Glad to see another family putting a positive light on the principle under the public spotlight. I too have a plural family with my two wives and (almost) 12 children. One of my wives is a direct descendent of Lorin C. Woolley – the only on in the principle if I understand correctly – though her parents were (are) staunch LDS.
I’m looking forward to obtaining and reading your book. I already have a copy of the first and only Mormon Fundamentalist magazine with the wives/mothers picture on it – I wish there would’ve been more.
I pray for the Lord’s protection in your personal and business lives now that you’ve “come out” publicly. I’ve been willing to do it, but my wives have been retiscent. And, given my other outspokenness in public forums, newspapers, and my running a few Mormon Fundamentalist discussion groups, I wonder how much your efforts will sway the public in your/our favor. But then, perhaps the experiences that will result, good and bad, will be mostly for your benefit. Rub off a few more rough edges! I know I could probably use it!
Well, good on you folks. I enjoyed the video I watched of “The Mighty Sequoyah”. Very talented, great music and lyrics, great crescendo from the beginning of the song to the end.
Best to you all! If we can help, let us know.
Clan Hansen
Chris, Michelle, Candace and family
We appreciate your prayers, and your support. We continue to be humbled and feel blessed at the unique opportunity we have to testify of our truth. Support from families like yours is especially rewarding to us.
Vicki, Valerie & Family,
I have followed your story since I first saw an interview with you on HBO a few years back. I just wanted to say that all the way back to grade school and thru high school with the two of you and all of your siblings I saw a wonderful loving family that has obviously carried on into a beautiful one of your own. Vicki, you will always be in my heart as one of my best childhood friends. I respect your lifestyle and love for your children and husband and wish you the best in your lives. I have always been intrigued by your family structure and fully support what makes you all so happy. Good luck with your book and everything going forward!
Alyson
Thank you Alyson! I often think back with fondness on my memories of you and I mastering our tricks on the bars. I recently tried to perform a few of those tricks when I brought my daughters to a nearby park. I am definitely out of practice, but still slightly impressed with myself. I remember inviting you to my house and wondering how you would react, all the kids, noise, messes etc. in contrast to your quiet, immaculately clean house. I felt you were a true friend. It would be fun to catch up sometime! Thank you for your support and wishes for our family. My family is everything to me which is why they are worth standing up for!
Lots of love to you,
Vicki
Right on a beautiful faithful family that most monogamous Americans can only dream about…may biblical living be restored in our lifetime!
Just read your book, and couldn’t rest until I published an article about it! Thank you for enlightening the rest of us – you gave the world a lot to think about!
Here’s the link to my article: http://midshorelife.com/article/love-times-three-peek-inside-modern-polygamy
Thank you for your support. We loved the review. We can only hope more of the world can have their eyes and their minds opened.
I saw your interview today on Dr. Phil, I enjoyed listening to your story! This life style is not for me but I find it very very interesting! I can’t wait to get my hand on your book and learn more. Thank you so much for sharing with the world…and Thank you for sharing your family!
God Bless you all,
Tiffine
Iam amaze!!!! from Puerto Rico, God bless !!! beautiful family…..
From Puerto Rico, God bless !!! beautiful family…..amaze!!!
I saw your interview on Dr. Phil today and really enjoyed listening to your story. I look forward to reading your book.
As a therapist with a private practice, I was disappointed to hear that it has been difficult for you to find a therapist that would work with your family! It breaks my heart to think of a couple/family needing support/help around their relationship(s) only to be greeted with judgment for their lifestyle. Keep looking for that open-minded therapist, we are out there!!
I saw your interview on Dr.Phil and enjoyed it. I think your family is beautiful and hope that people will not be so judgemental of your lifestyle and your religious views. Can’t wait to read your book!
I think it’s wonderful that you put your story out there. We live in a country where were are free to worship as we please. I am part of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. While I may not agree with your lifestyle…. I don’t disagree either because it is no place of mine or others to judge. I believe our Heavenly Father looks at each of our hearts accordingly. I’m a flawed human being who is constantly striving to choose the right. If I may be wrong I pray God forgives my error.
Anywho, I’m rambling. I support you guys and you are in my prayers constantly, especially for those circumstances when the enemy is against you.
Prayerfully from Georgia,
Sarah
I really enjoyed your book! It was very well written. I have never understood why your lifestyle is illegal. I am not religious, but I am behind you 100%. I admire anyone that is willing to fight for what they believe in and I wish your family the best.
Wow, I was very disapproving of the idea of what I had understood of this type of marriage, but after watching Dr. Phil’s show with your family, I am amazed! While I still personally choose my single marriage, I really do believe each wife is given the same time/care/support that I receive from my husband. Do not let society push the ‘common’ perception onto your family. You are doing the right thing by showing your commitment and your love and your amazing family to the western world. Thank you for showing the positive side of polygamy, as only the negative seems to get our attention in the media.
“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere”- Martin Luther King Jr.
Amazing book! Amazing Family! I was a Mormon for 56 years. Left the church 10 years ago. One of my issues was polygamy. After researching church history, I could not accept that it was divinely inspired. All I could see was abuse of women and children. Your story gives me a very different perspective. I felt I was reading the story of true Latter Day Saints. I respect your beliefs and strongly support your efforts to decriminalize polygamy. You are a credit to the LDS faith, whether they accept you or not.
BTW – That was an interesting paragraph about President John Taylor and the Priesthood Council with a separate line of priesthood authority outside of the church organization. I had never heard that before. Makes sense to me.
Glen,
It gave me chills reading your comment, thank you for such a heart felt expression! We believe all faith is to bring all of God’s children closer to Him, and in the end it is a deeply personal experience. We truly hope our friends in the LDS Church, whether they believe that this Principle of Plural Marriage is for this life or the next, will not be ashamed of their history. We hope our Christian friends can see that our faith is rooted in Jesus Christ, and we hope all of our brothers and sisters on this earth, will choose to not see our differences but to see we all share the common human experience and that we are all God’s children.
I am an atheist and do NOT believe that religious principles belong in legislation. Further, for most of human history, polygamy was the norm. I think we live in a society that can accommodate different types of family arrangements. As long as children are being provided with their material and emotional needs WHO CARES??
P.S. I am in a “traditional” monogamous marriage.
I found out about your story during the interview on the O’reilly Factor. I must admit, he came across much more gracious and open minded to your situation than I expected him to be. I hope that was really the treatment your family received from him. On to my point, I fully believe that whatever marital circumstances that any number of consenting adults arrange is no ones business but theirs. It concerns me that some people defend gay marriage for example, but view families like yours with scorn and ridicule. I have a hard enough time keeping up with one wife, so I can’t say that polygamy would be my choice, but I’m glad that it works for your family, and I will defend your right to make that choice. And Joe, you are a lucky sonofagun. You have very beautiful wives.
Having grown up in a plural family, I always believed I would as an adult as well. While that didn’t happen, I still hold true many of the things I was taught and believe. Many of my siblings now live plural marriage and I defend and respect all those who live it honorably. I joined the LDS church a few years ago and currently live in a monogamous marriage, but honestly, given the chance to join someone’s family as a plural wife…I’d jump at the chance!
I’m not familiar with LDS or polygamy but isn’t divorce still considered a sin, you said you would “jump at the chance” to join a family as a plural wife? I’m not being rude just truly curious?
I believe that RJBE was meaning that she “would have accepted the offer without delay, had the man proposing been married”. I do not read anything like she prefers plural marriage to the one she is enjoying now. However, (I guess) she is not unhappy if her husband was to bring a second one.
I read your book, very interesting, and spiritually enlightening. I admire your courage. I am not sure a poly lifestyle or a mono lifestyle can be lead perfectly in this imperfect world, but you are trying. I would be happy to count you as my friends, though I would never adapt your lifestyle in this world. Maybe on a trip to SLC, we can meet someday. I am curious though, since at the end of your book you claim to hold most dearly to the tenets of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, do you watch or attend their semi-annual conferences?
Thank you Rick for your compliments. We do watch conference on occasion. We also have had our children attend LDS church at times. If they would have us and allow us to embrace all of our principles we would be part of the LDS Church.
I love the idea of a polygamy family. I am a single mom to 3 kids. I wished I could find people interested in having a polygamy family. But in wyoming I have not been able to find anyone.
Your book continues to enforce no matter how old I am, at 55, I have so much more to learn about in life. I’ve told so many co-workers about how much I have learned about your lifestyle and great family values! I was intrigued with the turn of every page and often thought to myself, oh, if I could only have grown up with a Dad, three moms and all of those brothers and sisters! You make me feel I’ve missed out on so much family life. I’m so glad you came out as a family to introduce America to what it really means, and what great effort it takes to run a plural marriage/family. I had no idea. Thank you for educating me. Could I book at weekend getaway at your house for $500? I’d pitch in and cook!
Russ
To Joe, Vicky, Val, and Alina,
I enjoyed reading your book and it opened my eyes to a very unique lifestyle. You have a beautiful family. You all are sincere in your faith, thoughtful and possess character and integrity. I myself could never share a man – it seems like it is always the woman that has to do the spiritual growing. Jealousy is one emotion I can never get used to. Men never ever want to share their women – no matter the number.
I respect that you have never taken government assistance to pick up the tab for all your kids. But my concern is that of the problem of overpopulation – because I think there are families – both monagamous and polygymous – that have kids that they cannot suport so depend on the government and the taxpayer to pay the cost. I know that the FLDS depends on government support. I do not know if the planet can support unlimited population growth. China had to enact a law of one child per family because the population growth just got out of hand. I really believe in the idea of birth control and population control. The earth has limited resources. So this is an aspect of polygamy that distrubs me. Otherwise, I know that you are raising ethical, intelligent and productive kids who will make a postitivbe contribution to society.
Sincerely,
Erika
I just finished listening to your interview on NPR. I agree that polygamy should be decriminalized, but I still have personal issues with it. I feel like it promotes infidelity in an indirect way. Since the husband (and less often the wife) never really stops “shopping around” for a new addition for the family, the initial courtship of a new woman would, in my eyes, be considered cheating. I feel like basically you’re just swingers who happen to live together. That being said, I’m fine with consenting adults being swingers that live together.
Wow I am surprised at Erin’s comment above comparing multiple marriages (state sanctioned or not) the commitment of children, and individual(s) supporting the entire group, emotionally, financially, health-wise, the sharing of resources, mutual care-taking of children:yours. mine, ours- etc., with ‘swinging’ which from what I have heard does not encompass or even approach the same kind of scenario at all, let alone assume any kind of family, l;et alone marriage. I mean, there may be other scenarios that while they still are not reflective of the Darger family could be historical , various cultures or biblical that would even be closer than this strange comparison.
Even the logic is wrong in comparing whatever ‘swinging’ is with infidelity, which at the very least suggest sneakiness , while with with ‘swinging’ , I have heard that is something any kind of couple(s) enter into together, as one-dimensional as it may be, and certainly does not necessarily imply or contain all the commitments listed above, let alone love, whereas simple infidelity could be anything from a ‘one night stand’ to what is called an ‘affair’ or even something longer-term and more complex- but none of these are comparable to the Darger’s or what could be termed ‘modern-day polygamy’, whatever the configuration happens to be, the assumption is family and committed relationships, the physical side of it probably not being the foci , whereas in swinging, it appears from every TV, article, etc., that appears be the foci, and any kind of family or emotional stuff is kept separate or reserved for the individual couple outside the ‘swinger’ activities.
So while the poster Erin certainly has the right to her opinions, I believe I have effectively destroyed the argument/comparison she made. She also makes the assumption that the man is constantly ‘shopping around’ while that may not be the case at all. Just because it is possible doesn’t mean the man is looking to marry, or otherwise, every woman he finds attractive.
Intellectually, the argument can also be made as to what is considered infidelity. Some believe it is simply physical, but there are unfortunately many forms of betrayal that can far outstrip something simply physical. Even in the law what is considered ‘fiduciary duty’ , if one explores that, it is far more all-encompassing than that. Without trying to sound like either Andrea Dworkin or Ayn Rand (the latter of who had very complex relationships), the essence of the law of fiduciary duty is that one is not supposed to act or leverage power/advantage against the other, whether it be regarding things financial or children or threats, etc.
I really like what you are saying, and am glad I found your website. Please keep it up.
You may or may not want to put this up ( I know sometimes you don’t always approve posts for whatever reason but I’m not the type to take offense at all, I understand though you may get whatever my point was, others may not, believe me me I get it) but anyway, I found a couple articles, if you can call it that, in all their glorious inaccurac(ies) , and thought you might want to know about them simply because once again, not only is your life inaccurately and ‘broadly-brushed’ (like all polygamists are FLDS compound underage, or incesty etc.) but some articles don’t even have it together enough to distinguish between your life and bigamy, or they know very well it isn’t the same thing but intentionally want to confuse the issue.
I’m sure you are all well-versed in the constant tying together of things that don’t necessarily fit, or even outright lies- but there are people out there who just believe whatever they see/hear. Clearing up misrepresentation, inaccuracies, and making distinctions are important in what you’re doing and even though it may be rough to read or make you mad, or at the very least shake your heads, it’s good to know about.
http://www.aolnews.com/2011/03/21/man-charged-with-polygamy-after-defriending-first-wife-on-face/
“Thanks to Facebook, this accused polygamist’s relationship status is, well, “complicated.” Police in Michigan say they were able to arrest a polygamist after he “defriended” his first wife on Facebook. Richard Leon Barton’s first wife went to authorities after she realized her husband had married another woman in July, nixed their Internet friendship and posted photos of his second wedding on the popular social network.”
If the first wife didn’t know, and with the second had a ‘legal wedding/certificate’ that is not polygamy, and told the second he was divorced, that’s bigamy, right? If I’m wrong , I’m wrong but I think he has his definitions mixed up at the very least.
Here’s another one (you have to go back a page to see the beginning of this part of the article that addresses this segment- but (one of and probably biggest) problems is here is they are linking the practice of polygamy as it is practiced in a USA cultural , historical, Westernized and now modernized sense…with the middle-east , and even equating the practice there with radical extremists, the first page starting off with some truths, some half-truths and then building to this fear-mongering and gross inaccuracy (at least as applied to Western, modern-day)- consistently I see this comparison- sure, while polygamy is common world-wise, it is also expressed differently culturally, even within the greater Mormon culture itself- and I don’t see how it is at all linked to say the middle-east and/or how it is lived/expressed in tribal practices etc., in various other countries. This stuff must infuriate you, but at the same time, it is good to know about, so when you do give interviews , you can straighten out what people may have just believed ‘(duh because they saw it on TV or read it in a magazine or a site, it must be true’ mentality) :
“However, polygyny itself is not a sufficient cause of suicide bombing. Societies in sub-Saharan Africa and the Caribbean are much more polygynous than the Muslim nations in the Middle East and North Africa. And they do have very high levels of violence. Sub-Saharan Africa suffers from a long history of continuous civil wars—but not suicide bombings.”
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200706/ten-politically-incorrect-truths-about-human-nature?page=3
or this one that makes it look like you are campaigning for the legalization, when in fact you are not signing up to want the government in your business and they make it about that and try to establish hypocrisy that isn’t there. If they were truly interested in letting adults live their lives as they see fit, they are the ones who wouldn’t be so invested in throwing stones- because it sure looks like they are the ones ‘protecting’ the status quo, not you all.
http://www.conservativerefocus.com/blog5.php/2011/10/07/a-slippery-slope-polygamists-now-demanding-equal-access-to-marriage-along-with-gays
My family learned about your family tonight on, 20/20? While I don’t follow the polygamist beliefs, I do respect your life choices. The first polygamist family that sparked an interest in me was the Brown family. I found their lives interesting and I enjoy learning new things about others. Watching your families, shows us a new light in the polygamist religion. As long as there is no marrital or child abuse, who are we to say who someone should love?
During the final moments of the show, where your children talked about losing friends and being taunted at school over your religion, my son and I was still watching. My heart sank, children shouldn’t have to endure such hatred. Our son is 14 and he said that he’d never do this to someone if he learned they lived as your children do. We both agreed that those children were not true friends if they turned their backs on your children.
I don’t know how you are able to provide for such a large family or keep from pulling your hair out with all of the sibling rivalry but, kudos to you for standing up for your beliefs and sharing your beautiful family!
I just wanted to say how much I enjoyed meeting and visiting with some of your family at a book signing last night. I came home and anxiously started reading your book and couldnt put it down. I just finished it and I have to say I am almost jealous. You have a beautiful family and your story touched me in so many ways. I have always been raised to believe in polygamy even though my parents never had the oppurtunity to live it. I have been married to a wonderful man for almost 18 years and have 5 beautiful children and yet I have always felt like something was missing. I hope and pray every day for the chance to experience even a fraction of all the joy and love that can come from this lifestyle. I think you are all wonderful examples of faith, strong committment and unconditional love. My heart goes out to you all and I wish you the very best!
Melinda,
We enjoyed seeing you as well! We would have liked to visit more. Glad you enjoyed the book as well. Thank you again for your support and positive feedback.
Vicki
Hello Darger Family.
I am a 26 year old from the Netherlands.
My parents where divorce when I was 11.
My father he died last year was a good person
Only one with a alchol problem
So the father/daughter relation ship was not always good.
You could also imagine that is was also hard for my mother
Because she had no one to go tho for mariage suport.
Luckley I have a Uncle maried to my mothers Sister,
Who help my mother to rais me, to the person I am today.
My mother sister is my Godmother as we ar catholic
And I consider her as my second mother.
And my cousin her daughter is my best friend.
I am not saying that my mother should marry her brother in law.
But we are very lucky that this man “suport” a second family next to his own.
With love
Ellen
I just wanted to say how much I love your family! Although I am still figuring out my spiritual beliefs, in my heart I’ve always wanted to live a polygamist lifestyle. Your family has inspired me to look further into the Principle. Your lives seem so full of love and happiness, I truly look up to you. Your book is the first thing on my Christmas list and I’m sure I’ll find some of the guidance I’m looking for.
Obviously I’m in full support of the decriminalization of polygamy, but for one man to be married to three of the most beautiful women I have ever seen… it’s just not fair
Hillary,
Thank you for your kind words. Let us know what you think about the book after you finish it. Our spiritual journey is the most important thing we will do in our lives and one of the most challenging, so we wish you well with that path. We only wish that all people, so long as they seek that spiritual path in a way that they can account for the dictates of their conscience can choose so freely.
And you are correct, it is not fair how beautiful they are, I definitely married up!
Joe
I just finished your book. It was so interesting that I couldn’t put it down until I was done. I respect your lifestyle, am just not sure I could live it. But you all seem so happy and there seems to be so much love! Glad it is working for you.
Kristi,
We are glad you enjoyed the book. Thank you for taking the time to post! We certainly don’t think it is for everyone, but just want to be able to live freely as we choose.
Joe
Good Afternoon, I have just finished watching the Dr. Phil show and it is so refreshing to see a family that are polygamist and are living a joyful life. I am curious about polygamy and want to talk to others of this life style. Where would I start?
Merry Christmas,
Natalie
Natalie,
Merry Christmas to you. Maybe our book will answer many of your questions about polygamy as it goes into it much deeper than we could on the show. There are also some online forums of polygamous people, Mormon, Christian and Muslim depending on what you are looking for as well. Of course when we are able we are more than willing to answer questions on our blog. God bless,
Dargers
Hi, we live in Florida and saw you on the Dr. Phil show. We are not a big fan of Dr. Phil but we feel the Lord has given us a vison to seek out a pural marriage. We loved the show and how there was a lot of repect to you and your family. My wife and I have been in the ministery for over 30yrs.We have given up friends and church people to believe the way we feel in our hearts. We are still looking for another wife to share with and love. Thank you for your inspiration and hope. We will be praying with you to live the way we hope to. Cindie and Hal
Dear Darger Family
I just recently finished your book and I honestly can say that I could not put it down! I checked it out from the library after I saw your family on Dateline. I just want you all to know that I grew up just knowing about polygamy from the news and all the bad press that Warren Jeffs created and the FLDS church in Texas. I want you all to know that you have completely changed my perspective on the subject. I would love to learn more.
Thank you all for opening my eyes!
God Bless
I just got done reading your book after being very interested in your story on Dr. Phil. All I can say is WOW! My heart was touched and although I am a very happily married gal, the things you have all talked about with your relationships with one another and your children really provided insight in my own life. Monogamous or Polygamous this book should be viewed by ANYONE wanting to strengthen their own relationships! i know I will forever be moved and inspired by the functionality in your family! You all are a true inspiration and I certainly hope that if America is ready and willing to legalize Gay marriage that they will be touched by your story as i was and legalize your ways of life as well. No one should be prosecuted for living the wonderful life you all do!
Thanks for sharing your story and life with the rest of the world!
Jamie,
Thank you for sharing your experience in reading the book.
Val
Hi! I just finished reading our book and I have to say it was one of the best books I have ever read. Thank you very much for sharing your story. I laughed and I cried while reading about times through out your life and it was very inspirational to me. My husband and I have been married for 6 years and we have recently started discussing the polygamist lifestyle. I just dont know if I could share him. Needless to say I am the one holding us back from this lifestyle. After reading your book and reading the Bible and Prayer my husband feels this is the path in which God is calling him. I however fully support the idea but am not sure if I could do it. I have been praying and seeking God’s will on the situation. I feel that the U.S. should legalize it because we should all have freedom of religion without having to worry about being prosecuted for it. I admire you all for sharing your life with us and I fully enjoyed the book I couldn’t put it down. It really opened my eyes to alot of things. Thank You and God Bless You All
Bobbi
Bobbi
That is high praise, thank you for your kind words. We feel strongly that it should be out of faith and not for selfish reasons. The thought of sharing is always hard and understandably so. Turning to God and finding His will is the only way. It has to be something you are absolutely sure of and never anything that you feel pressured to do, or do because you think you should feel good about. Many blessings to you and your husband on a righteous journey.
Thank you Alina. I really appreciate your response. My husband amd I are definitely seeking God’s will. If plural marriage is what He has planned for us then I feel He will let us know and He will help me with my insecurities. Thank you again for your reply and for your well wishes . Take Care and God Bless
Darger family, thanks for having the courage to share your story. You’ve inspired me, standing up for your family and your beliefs is so very hard. Your sacrifices will pay off in the future. I hope you would consider writing another book.
Thank you for your support and for believing in us! What would you like to see another book about?
Your lives are extraordinarily different. Your family struggles on several different fronts. Surely the stories of your struggles could not be limited to one book. As you’ve proven in your first book, families come in all shapes and sizes, and those families should be allowed and even encouraged in this country. Continuing to chronicle your struggles could only encourage people to see your seemingly taboo lifestyle as something most people could eventually relate too. People tend to accept what they can relate too. Best wishes for happiness in the future Darger family!
I love your book! It’s inspiring! I don’t see why the law doesn’t legalize polygamy. I brought your book and in five hours I finished it. It makes me want to choose this lifestyle. Your wives are not oppressed and your children are so happy! I been a monogamous for 9 years and I’m getting bored over here. I’m happy you guys wrote your book because it inspired me. The book is a eye opener and hopefully you guys can write another book. God Bless you all and your family!!! I pray that one day Polygamy can be legalized:) Happy New Years and many blessings to your wonderful family! We support you!
I haven’t read your book, but I have seen your wonderful family on 20/20 and Dr Phil. I am very impressed in the love and dedication that you have within your family and I think that some “regular” families could have a lot to learn in that regard, where in this day and age the kids are plonked in front of electrical devices and pretty much ignored. Great parenting.
I just watched your interview on Dr. Phil, and i am really looking forward too reading your book. I have read books before on polygamist marriages but have never reacted the way i have to your story. Although our lives are somewhat different (i am married, with 2 small children) i would like too say i think your beautiful family is amazing! You need too be applauded, there appears too be so much love and caring and respect within your family, it is truely beautiful too see. Whether you live with 3 sister wives or 10, a house with that much love could only be a blessing too be amoungst.
Donna
Donna
It’s nice to hear from mothers like yourself, it is evident that you too have a lot of love in your family to get it. We hope by sharing our experiences good and bad we can inspire families every where to be the best they can be.
I cannot wait to read this book! (:
Lots of love to your family from New Zealand!
I love your family!!! i dated sam about 2 years ago and i can honestly say i have never met a family with more love and warmth! You helped me through a very emotional time and for that i can never repay you! Congratulations on the book! I loved it!! and Thank You for all that you did for me!
I just read your book and i thought it was a wonderful counter to all the tragic stoies pooring out of the flds community. It makes me sad that people generalize based on the worst examples.
Although not in a plural marriage i could relate to alot of the day to day in your world, all be it on a much smaller scale! My ex-husband, current partner and myself co-parent and maintain a very close relationship. As a result we have suffered ridicule from friends and family. Dealing with strange looks and snide comments is hard enough, i can’t imagine the strength each one you posess to be able to stay this course and keep so much light and love in yout hearts!
I was introduced to your family through your son, Samuel. I knew him from middle school in Riverton where we became friends. After middle school, I didn’t see him or speak to him until recently. We have gotten to know each other pretty well and continue to become better friends. He boasted about his large family and how he wouldn’t have it any other way. He spoke about the book you published and encouraged me to read it. I purchased it and couldn’t put it down, frequently asking Sam questions. I finished it in literally two days. I truly have had my faith shaken by your family. Between Sam and your words in your book, I have further developed my own beliefs and have been learning the power of prayer as well as fasting. I am amazed by the love and how tight knit your family is. You truly are a phenomenal example of what family should be. I have gained so much respect and admiration for your strength and perseverance through your journey. I get butterflies when i tell others about the book that should be next on their reading list. I even have been teaching my own parents about what I have learned about polygamy in hopes they will be another voice in acceptance for all. Thank you for voicing your story to help others understand and become more accepting. It certainly has changed my views and made me want to be a better person as well as inspired me to establish a firm standing in what I believe in. Your story will definitely stay close to my heart. You and your children deserve all the blessings life has to offer! Take care and God bless.
Kristen
P.S. You raised an amazing son! He is easily one of the most respectful, kind, and definitely one of the smartest people I have ever known. I am so grateful to have met him!
Kristen,
Wow! We are touched by your kind words and the impact on your life you have expressed. We most certainly hope to be able to meet you in person. Thank you for getting the message of love and being willing to share it. We are humbled by such a sincere expression as yours and hope we remain worthy of such emulation.
Alina,
Thank you again from the bottom of my heart!
I hope to meet you all as well. Sooner is better than later, I’m sure of it! It’s been a very life changing experience for me and I have Samuel to thank for starting the flame.
Kristen
I just read your book. It was refreshing to read a book filled with so much love. From the love and respect each wife has for the other to the care and planning each person contributes to the family. Even in your darkest days you still found a positive answer by helping others. I think you are a model family and while no family is ever perfect you have given each member a solid foundation to build a productive life. Thank you for sharing your families story.
Amanda
On another note, can the ladies please share all of their money saving ideas? I am a couponer and follow many money saving blogs, but feel I could do better.
Amanda,
We will definitely add money saving ideas to it. Vicki has written some blogs on that in the past, but we will expand the category “saving money” to explain the economics of our family.
Thank you for all the hard work you are doing. To have polygamy decriminalized seems like an overwhelming task, but I appreciate your efforts in taking it on. The United States abolished slavery and segregation. The United States accepts gay and lesbian lifestyles. In the huge number of cases where there are no abuses, why can’t the people of this country open their hearts and minds to the concept of plural marriage among consenting adults?
Dear family
I live in the Netherlands and just saw your family on the dr. Phil show. You can be very proud on yourselves while you are living your lives the way you want to.
I saw a lot of love and respect for each other and think you are a very nice and loving family!
I wish you lots of love
Ineke
I wanted to say that I enjoyed reading your book! I also used it in a final exam paper (I chose to do it on Fundamentalist Mormons and Polygamy)that I did for my Multicultural Counseling class, for my Masters degree in Counseling. I am a Social Worker and love to learn about different cultures and religions. I was intrigued to learn more about your religion when I fell in love with the show “Sister Wives.”
I wanted to let you know as a Social Worker, I am a non-judgemental person, and reading your book helped me understand what kind of person that I wanted to be in my daily life and in my career choice. I believe that everyone in the world has the right to their own thoughts, believes and ways of life as long as they are not harming themselves or another.
Your family is an amazing family and if you’re ever in Wisconsin, send an email I would love to meet your family!! I send blessings and love on everything that you and your family does!!
Winter
Thank you, what a wonderful and too often a thankless profession to go into. Our respect goes out to you. We are making friends everywhere and would love to go to Wisconsin some day! We are hoping to get some Fundamentalists social workers, we currently have two that we are aware going to school and hope they are able to make a difference.
I just read through most of your website and was left with the impression of a very happy, healthy family. As a psychologist, I think that the arrangement you have is probably more stable and less stressful than most conventional marriages, and certainly better for raising children. Congratulations on your courage and hard work in creating a wonderful family!
i just read an article in a dutchnews paper that brought me here i can see the love you have for each other and it should not matter if you have a love times three as longs
as you al agree and love each other
sending you all lots of love from the netherlands
We have had lots of comments from our new Dutch friends, thank you for sending your love!
Dear all,
i found you deleted my post as I straightforwardly asked some question which migh be your privacy, however which is most concerned by us who has only single marriage i think, So, pls don’t mind. and would you pls tell me about my question?
I honestly send blessings and love on everything that you and your family does!!
Kermit,
Thank you for your support. If you read through our book and this blog I think you will find most of your questions answered concerning our intimate life.
Dear Dargers just finished the book and loved it! Thank so much for having the courage to share your life choices and beautiful family I learnt so much from you all on the need to continuously work on your relationships to achieve true fulfilment and happiness. I will always remember what I have learnt from your book. You should all be proud that you are making a contribution to a future where all of mankind lives and lets live. God bless you and best wishes.