Since we published Love Times Three in the fall of 2011, we have stated several reasons for our activism (see earlier posts). The injustice of criminalizing our family, our lifestyle and thousands of people like us occur by allowing the past to constrain who we are. Our family has simply not been willing to remain quiet any longer.
Tonight you will see a very personal portrayal on TLC’s show My Three Wives. (The show with air December 18, 10pm ET/8pm MT on TLC, for those who are watching on Xfinity cable, it will be on Channel 30, TLC-W at 11pm MT and 1am MT). The show captures a moment as we discuss our daughter Kyra, who passed away nearly 12 years ago. She is still the inspiration behind all we do. We first wrote Love Times Three hoping to share our story in a dignified and deliberate way. Our desire was two-fold, as a tribute to Kyra’s memory, and so our children and other families like us could live freely, without fear.
Since the publishing of our book, we have grown even closer as a family. While we have experienced some negativity, overwhelmingly people have understood the message and really get the idea that families, which are free to construct together in love, are not threatening.
Recently, we have watched as the Warren Jeff’s led, FLDS sect continues to implode with such travesty and human cost. It has become increasingly apparent that what he represents is not about polygamy, it is about abuse and control. When any segment of society is criminalized, the opportunity exists for unscrupulous manipulation of a population through fear. If the criminal status of polygamy is removed from the equation, abuse can be dealt with as abuse.
We admire the Brown’s valiant lead forward in their legal case now before the Utah courts. The injustice they have endured because of the law is a common theme in our culture. In spite of the “different” family structure, the show Sister Wives has been very successful. At the end of the day, the Browns are together because they love each other and choose to stay committed, which is something everyone can understand.
While we often find it difficult to be public, Alina, Vicki, Valerie and I understand if we allow others to define us, we do not have a choice. Twelve years ago, as we dealt with the pain of our loss, we hoped to cause a change in the way plural families were treated in our home town and state. We never imagined ourselves writing a book or going on national television. We choose to be public now because for us, it is not about entertaining. It is about freedom; it is about faith, and it is about our family. We are a family not because the state says we are, not even because a ceremony proclaimed it as such; we are a family because in our love of one another, we have declared our commitment to each other and to our children.
Thank you for your prayers, your support and your love. The comments, emails, words of encouragement, and care sent from around the world have touched our family and made all the difference for us in sharing our story. We hope you enjoy our documentary, and more importantly we ask you to join us in spreading a message of love and freedom for all people, and for strengthening families however they are constructed.